TALLAHASSEE, FL — An area six-sided die is desperately hoping the players of tactical board game ZombiE=MC2 discover it’s not a standard die, but rather one marked 1-1-2-2-3-4. “Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap,” reports the green die, “This is just going to muck everything up.”
To date, local gamers had not noticed the discrepancy. “Dang, another hit!” said Cadence McEnnis, referring to the fact that Mark Fellbottom had once again rolled a 4 or less to achieve success. “Seriously,” McEnnis continued, “Have you missed yet?” Fellbottom confirmed that he had not, to his recollection.
“Oh, come on!” reported the die. “Just look at me! The double 1’s and 2’s are right next to each other. Has no one thought to check, or even look at their hands once in a while?!”
At press time, the victorious Fellbottom was in the process of placing the distraught die back into the dice bag with his brethren, sowing the seeds for future discord.